My 2020 Word of the Year

Every year I make resolutions. And every year I start out the year with good intentions. I’ll eat well 80% of the time, won’t yell at my kids, and exercise five times week. Then I fail at one of my lofty resolutions, and the shame spiral sets in. I eat all the chocolate, wash it down with couple glasses of wine.  I’m a failure who can’t stick to anything. Pity party- table for one, anyone? 

This year, I wanted to do nothing. Welcome the new year, but not attach goals or restraints. But a “word of the year” kept calling to me. I didn’t want to answer. It was another way for me to fail and disappoint myself. But this word kept taunting me like my 7-year old nagging me for more iPad time. I could envision the word written across my life this year. This little word has already weaved itself into the wee bit of progress I’ve made on myself this month. The word is simple. Acceptance. 

Acceptance for:

Where I am in life 
I thought I’d have a career and be veryyyy far along in it. Calling the shots and leading a team to something- winning a Pultizer or world domination, who knows? Instead, I’m a homeschoolin’ SAHM who couldn’t imagine wearing dress clothes, sitting in a cubicle or reporting to a manager anymore.

My weight 
It’s been 10 years since I gained all the weight when pregnant with my first child. Ten years! Learn that life doesn’t magically become better at a certain number on the scale. Start living the life I want today.

Who I am 
Deep breath. This is my mountain to climb. My Goliath. This is tricky because we’re always changing and growing. Well, most of us. I’ve been out of touch with who I am for years as I raised tiny humans and now educating them, too. So many question marks lurk with this statement. It’s time to own who I am and let her out to rule the world. Or at least this house.

Life is what I make it
It’s my husband’s job that moves us to a new state every few years, but what I make of my life in our new location is up to me. I have the ability to embrace the change and be happy. Or fight it and be miserable. It’s time I work on healing from our move and welcome the change.

I made a vision board because acceptance wouldn’t leave me alone until I invited it into my life. The board spoke all the things I’d been saying to myself for months. It’s a daily reminder to not let life happen each day, but be intentional with my actions. My actions matter. I matter. I pinned it in my office so I am reminded what I want this year to be for me.*

Positivity, encouragement, words of affirmation. Acceptance. I like it. Did you set New Year’s resolutions? Do you have a word of the year? Share with me!

*I wrote this post when I chalk full of caffeine and good intentions. Creating vision board became more of a chore than cathartic activity. I couldn’t execute the exact vision in my head and it all went downhill from there. So, this is what happened. I pinned it to my cork board. After I hung up the cork board in my office yesterday. It’s still a daily reminder of my intentions, right? Just not as pretty. 

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