Unexpectedly Homeschooling

homeschool

I’ve been keeping a secret from you. I’ve been fairly tight-lipped about it since it happened in early December. I was scared, unsure and nervous about it all. It wasn’t something I’d planned on doing, but in my heart I knew it was the right thing to do for my little girl.

I started homeschooling Suvi.

Her discomfort and anxiety had been brewing for months now that I reflect back on the year. It started over the summer. She would occasionally become distraught over starting a new school in September. (Our district boundaries changed and our neighborhood was sent to a different elementary school.) Maybe it was the fact it was her third school in as many years or that her best friend moved over the summer, but she was upset.

Her mood intensified as the school year began. We talked about what was going on, but nothing helped. She began having what I call “Morning Meltdowns” on a regular basis. They ranged from claiming she was suddenly sick to screaming fits where I was forced to dress her, wipe away tears and shove her out the door in time for the bus. I never knew what type of morning we were going to have. This behavior progressively got worse throughout the year.

Suvi’s teacher was surprised to hear about this behavior at parent-teacher conferences in October. She told me Suvi was a great student (she had the grades to prove it) and was quiet. Yet she came home frequently with her nails bloodied from picking, frequent stomach aches and headaches, and withdrew from us when she came home from school. She was exhausted at the end of the day from emotionally trying to hold it together at school.

After a particularly trying week of daily Morning Meltdowns, I was exhausted and worried about my daughter’s wellbeing. On Friday, she had an epic meltdown. Thirty minutes later it ended with her screaming she couldn’t calm down and needed my help. My heart broke into a million pieces watching my daughter spiral downward over second grade. I was done. I couldn’t send her to school anymore. I couldn’t watch her continue on his self-destructive path over school.

I had discussed homeschooling with my husband before, but more in passing. I didn’t know how, or where to start, but I knew right then in my heart that homeschool the best choice for my child at this time.

We might put her back in public school at some point, but for now we’re taking it year by year. I’ll post about our homeschool adventures on the blog. I was hesitant to share such personal details, but when I shared my daughter’s issues on a local Facebook homeschool group I received over 30 responses of parents claiming their child had similar issues. It made me feel like I wasn’t alone, and there wasn’t something wrong with my child. So, if this is your child- please reach out me if you’d like to chat.